"There is a part of every living thing that wants to become itself. The tadpole into the frog, the chrysalis into the butterfly, a damaged human being into a whole one. That is spirituality."
- Ellen Bass
"I don't race to win. I race to make myself whole."
- Steve Ilg
it's mind boggling to think that in 1 Day, 22 hours, and 32 minutes from now, i will again toe the Start Line of perhaps my most Sacred Running Pilgrimage of my Blessed Life;
Imogene Pass Run
i've had a love affair with this
"most brutal trail race in Colorado," since the late seventies.
i still read my favorite book of all time:
Tomboy Bride, as sacred scripture to get ready for this historic pilgrimage through the backyard mountains of my youth; the splendid San Juans.
ilg was a top-20 finisher back in the day.
the day after tomorrow?
i will be just trying to reach the Summit in the time i used to finish the entire 17.1-mile route!
i've written enough about the intimidating elevation and course layout in past years; you can read about all that on the race website or explore the
DL Archives for my Race Reports.
this morning, i wish to dwell on the fact that has already emerged;
Ilg Has Already Won just by training steadfastly for this weekend's pilgrimage.
Ask any new parent. They'll know what i mean.
as i grow older, a world of recollection captures the essence of why i choose to be a wholeness freak when it comes to fitness and sport performance. despite being unenlightened, decades of multi-disciplined sweat and stillness has thinned enough of my personal cloud of unknowing
(known in yoga as 'avidya') for me to become chronically enraptured by a sense of a higher calling...a deeper knowing beyond life's ups and downs.
i spoke just now of steadfast training for Imogene.
any steady effort to hold onto a dream - a goal - will awaken dormant and unrealized potential. what fascinates is how blind-sided comes these Divine Awakenings of our innate enlightenment potential. rarely can we telegraph our next transpersonal Shift. it just, well, happens. Shift Happens. nothing really changes, except everything becomes calmer, clearer, more abiding.
and for me, Shift Happens because i stay focused on goals...dreams...podiums of self.
if ilg doesn't have a Start Line in my short, medium, and long-term future, then the future holds no interest. motivation stalls. the grip of mediocrity arrives and immediately i fight like a wild boar in order to higher soar.
ilg does not know what is your next Start Line...
your next podium of self...
your next most Sacred Mountain to climb.
i can only guess that it is that which frightens you most.
it's that which causes you the most pain, the deepest anguish.
Imogene, for me, has long frightened me since i broke my back.
even last year, ilg was more scared than sacred; i did not know to what degree my spinal injury would compress my vertebral nerves along the 3.5 hours of high concussion upon my fractured skeleton.
we must always, endlessly, start where we are and cultivate with steady effort the vision we have for ourselves. the Path we choose will not necessarily make sense. we must use time wisely to follow the guidance of our spiritual being within; our spiritual heart. at age 16, i was a shoe-in to become an Olympian - if i stayed sport-specific. yet, i chose to follow a Path of Wholeness and Service to others.
and my heart has recorded each challenge, each new life that i began as my exploration into daring myself toward versatility instead of specificity roared from within.
i truly feel that my decades of Wholeness training has made me a far better partner, teacher, and most importantly, a father - than if i would have stayed narrowed and obsessively sport-specific. as i get passed by scores of more fleet footed warriors and warrioresses than i come Saturday, i'll relax deeper into this realization and just relish my Imogene Pilgrimage for what she means to me.
so, this weekend, ilg will cash my pranic paycheck up, up, way up along the ridges of the Uncompaghre. i'll hover up there - breathing a waving carpet of respiration molecules upon the wildflowers, decayed timbers of abandoned mines, and the bleached, splintered bones and stones.
i've done what it took to toe the Start Line of my next daring.
Saturday will not be a race as much as a celebration of a New Daddy, an old mountain yogi, a small boy still yearning toward a Higher Wholeness.
though the Start Gun has yet to go off,
this year,
ilg has already won.
no matter what.
FOR THE STATISTICALLY-BENT: My Race Time from Last Year:
Summit (13,120'):
2:36:49
Finish:
3:37:43
Division Placing:
35
Overall Placing:
215
COACHING NOTE:
do NOT attempt to replicate the below training volumes, especially given my low caloric intake. i have decades experience on SUNRIDER Herbs, MAP Aminos, and yogic pranayams to make these figures safe and healthy. you risk injury, and illness and compromised training effect if you attempt to mimic these statistics.
(due to professional safety, i only post my training stats these days for DL Subscribers. thank you for understanding)I'll update you when possible, however, we will be staying in the Ouray/Telluride nirvana through Monday....enjoy the
DL Archives, leave a love note for me in our
SanghaLounge, read
TOMBOY BRIDE, and most of all; do what it takes to toe your next Start Line.
the deepest victories of self occur before the Start Line.
and thank you for all the well-wishes...
send me a mantra this Saturday, okay?
Om Mani Padme Hungilg
photo by Bill Benzell; at last years Homolovi Hopi Traditional Foot Race (3rd place). again this year, i used the Hopi Races matched by long, high altitude runs on Doko Oosliid to prepare my body, mind, and spirit for Imogene Pass Race.
